I've had multiple projects that I just had to call a stop to right where they were, recently. One was not a stop to the whole project, just to that bit. I've been carrying a spinning project with my tiny Jenkins Kuchulu in an Altoids tin.
I had meant to keep spinning until I had a good-sized turtle (turtle is what you call the cop on a Turkish spindle) and the spindle started to slow, but the cop got too big for the Altoids tin to close properly, so I took it off and started a new one. The turtle eventually got wound into a skein and washed, and is lovely, but is not so long a skein as I might have liked.
Next, it was the set of straps I mentioned in my last entry. I'd been having trouble with these from the beginning. I had a huge amount of trouble tensioning the warp evenly, which is absurd with a continuous warp, I had a hard time with the string heddles, everything. The weave-along I started them for was long over. They were making me crazy. I finally said Fuck It and cut them off the loom. I got about 16" of each one, and they vary in width from 3/4" to 1.5". One will be a choker for my wife, and the other is tied to my laptop bag, because somebody else at the place I'm trying to get a job at had the same bag. I rather like them, even if they never did turn into what I wanted them to be.
And then I finally went back to the seascape cocoon shrug. Only it turned out that I had forgotten to release the tension, and several of the more delicate warp thread had snapped, some of them in the web. I spent half an hour or so trying to find ways to fix it, but the new threads of the same yarn kept snapping, too.
Finally, when I was nearly crying, Kate suggested I just call this one done, too.
This one was the hardest. I had plans for this. I wanted to make this into something wearable for my mom. I wanted this to be my first Saori clothing project. And I simply couldn't.
The yarn was easy. I just stopped that skein right there. Fine. Doesn't matter. There's plenty more fiber, and I often work in short sections of one yarn.
The straps were harder. I had to give up on the project, but at least it wasn't an important project. I still want to do straps for sandals at some point, but what the hell, I'll do them when I get that inkle loom I want.
But this. This feels like a real failure.
I did it anyway. I cut it off and knotted the fringe and washed it and all. But it still feels like failure. And I simply don't know what to do about that.
Oh well. It's pretty.
It's all a lesson in humility.
Too sick right now to start anything new, but next I owe a devotional weaving to Hermes. I think I'll do that on the frame loom. I've been doing some reading on ancient Hellenic weaving, and some vase paintings show really very similar frame looms being used by young women for what is clearly fancy work.
I've decided that I'm going to start collecting my loom waste and using it to make offering-weavings to Athene when I have enough, as thanks for the gift of my skill. Also considering dedicated my shuttles to her. Hellenes used to dedicate loom weights to her, but of course I don't have a warp-weighted loom.
I've got some other posts waiting to be published, but I still want to get off Wordpress before posting too much more.